Ground Control To Major Jon

Cue the music maestro.....
(it's that playlist on your right)

Santa Claus is highly overrated.

The Rays are in the World Series. Game One: 5pm PTownTime. 

God Bless America !

Officially Funny David Chalk at Bugs and Cranks asked me if I'd like to do a Guest Blog about Jonny Gomes. Not feeling quite worthy of roasting Jonny on my own, I forwarded David a Very Rough Draft. Alexander Fleming made penicillin out of moldy cheese and Chalk made Jonny even funnier than he already is.

Take it away Chalk: Bugs and Cranks: Bugs and Cranks: The Regal Madness of Jonny Gomes

Rays in 5.

Ground Control to Major Tom Jon.

Take your protein pills and put your helmet on

Ground control to Major Tom Jon

Commencing countdown engine's on

Check ignition and may God's love be with you

(in case the Phillies take that Rocky thing seriously…)

Really? Rays Phillies World Series A Ratings Bust?

The blogs are abuzz about the looming TV Ratings Bust that a Tampa Bay / Philadelphia World Series will bring.  Commenters by the dozen quip, "Who outside these two cities even cares?"

You can bet Major League Baseball and FOX were making room in the vault for a Pink Hat Nation (once known as the Boston Red Sox) and LA Dodgers matchup.  Tradition, 90 million years of drama, star studded camera angles... big buck$.  Even a Rays/Dodgers series would have play off starved fan appeal on two coasts.

But the Rays and the Phillies? The naysayers don't think that anyone outside those area codes knows a thing about 'em, much less care how it turns out.  While this matchup is not the cash cow it might have been, here are PTown's Points To Ponder when fickle fingers find the remote tomorrow night:

1. Good time to buy stock in West Coast Pizza Chains:  An 8pm East Coast start time means mama's gotta cook during the game.  Ain't gonna happen in this house.  Pizzicato, Pappa Murphy's, Old Chicago, and Mary's Pizza are programmed into the speed dialer.  4 games, 4 pizzas.  4,000 miles of cardio at the gym between games.  
2. Not one, but TWO players are repping the "707" in this series: Jonny Gomes does not have a lock on the love from fans to the north.  Eric Bruntlett, the Phillies starting shortstop, was acquired by the Phils last November. Eric, who lives in Santa Rosa, was t-h-i-s close to a karma filled coaching appearance at CampForACure until the Astros called to tell him his cleats would be waiting even further from home in 2008.  I'd say the commute was worth it.
3. America loves an underdog. And the baseball world is full of them.  The Rays "zero to hero" story has a lock on the whole Underdog thing.  But baseball is full of hometown kids made good. There will be 50 of them on the field this week. Each with a network guys they played ball with from Little League on up... with their own legion of fans.  The thrill of a World Series victory with a home town connection. That's got to be good for a point or two in the ratings. Woonsocketians, just a stone's throw from BeanTown know what I mean. (Thanks Bugs and Cranks)
4. "The dog ate my homework" only has a prayer of working on the East Coast: With a 5:00 start out west, there's still lots of time to git 'er done.  But back east, it's bedtime for the little guys before the game even starts. 
5. This series will feature baseball players, not movie stars:  Seriously, it's annoying as hell when the TV dudes eat an entire inning interviewing some Hollywood Hottie DURING THE WORLD SERIES?  But Tampa Bay has a few. Apologies in advance for the predictable cameo appearances of The Great Hulk Hogan and Mike Alstott.   Jonny, 707's Shock Jock, has become somewhat of a hybrid in his 26th Man Role. Half MLB Star, half Papparazi Photo Op.  But at least he's in the dugout.  But seriously Jonny, when you go to meet the president in a few weeks, borrow a shirt OK?

Photo: Getty Images

Young Rays Fan Takes One For The Team

Jonny Gomes continues to generate as many photo ops as the 25 guys that get their names in the box score each night.  PTown's fire breathing,  axe swinging   shock jock set the Ray Hawk craze in motion and it just keeps gathering steam.   Whew.  Hope those mouse clicks were worth the trouble ;-)

Last week 7th Grader Zachary Sharples, his dad, and younger brother hopped on the RayHawk bandwagon in the ultimate show of support for their team.  The Powers That Be were less than inspired when Zach got to school the next day.  The Princi-pal invoked the "high and mighty" princi-ple and deemed Zachary's hawk to be a distracting hairstyle . Despite the District Office's failed attempt to provide documentation of said dresscode clause.  Zach's options?  Serve In-school Suspension til his hair grows out or shave his head (like that's not distracting???).  Little did they know that the Sharples were moving across the Bay to RayHawk friendly St. Pete just a few days hence.  Problem solved. 

Jonny, having had a few brushes of his own with the PTBs in his youth, wanted to be sure that Zach felt the love and appreciation of the entire Rays Organization.  The Sharples were already planning to attend Game Two of the ALCS at St. Pete's new tourist Mecca, Tropicana Field so Jonny arranged a surprise on-field pass for the young lad.  Here's Zach to tell you all about it:



Did you happen to catch the Reverse RayHawks several Boston fans were sporting during the game last night?  Me neither.  But PTownJr spotted them and was quite excited.  The burgeoning Rays Blogger Network quickly Googled to the ends of the Internet looking for pics. Coming up short, the ever reliable Bugs and Cranks provided this Artist's Rendering of Dennis Eckersley with a Reverse RaysHawk.  It illustrates, quite well, the Red Sox Nation's failed attempt to hijack the Rays mojo. I used to like Eck. A lot. But he's been a little to pro-Beantown for me this week.  Serves him right.

What can possibly be next?